The News Is In

This past Wednesday was a long one for me. It was the day I would learn my fate for the weeks and months to come. I suffered through yet another CT scan in the morning and drank enough of that nasty iodine liquid to make a guy sick. Then, I was injected with the glowing liquid while my body was scanned. Normally it makes me nauseated, but thankfully the techs listened to me and things went fine.

I met my oncologist later that afternoon to find out the results, but they were not in yet. He did a physical to check for any lumps, he said things looked good. He told me that even though the results hadn't come in, he could tell me the three scenarios. First, if my lymph nodes had gone down, no more treatment would be required. Second, even if they were the same size, we would likely stop treatment and just keep an eye on things. Third, (and the most upsetting) -- if the nodes had gotten larger, more aggressive treatment would be required along with a possible bone marrow transplant.

After I left the doctor's office, I thought about that third option for the next few hours. I thought about how much I had already been through, and how I didn't want to deal with anymore major operations or treatments. But then again, some people are much worse off -- maybe it would be something I could handle... maybe I would be fine?

Later that evening I was hanging out with my friends Zeke and Thane at a brew pub in downtown Portland, when my phone flashed that I had a new voicemail. It was the news I had been waiting for. The doc reported that my lymph nodes had gone completely back to normal! I was THRILLED! No more treatment! I am very happy to hear that my life just might be going back to normal after two years of this! We can all hope right? Zeke and Thane were happy for me as well and even bought me dinner that night. It was a good way to end an otherwise nervous day.

I'm not totally out of the woods yet, but as long as things remain clear over the coming weeks and months my odds will continue to improve as far as remission and recovery goes.

So there you have it, I might actually be okay... at least for now. And that's all that counts. When you're me, you take things day by day and hope for the best. Now I can give my body the next few weeks to heal up from the damage that was done as a result of what has been done to it... then maybe after that I can start going to the gym again. Life as I know it might return to normal -- whatever that means.

-LB

P.S. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

It's Time For An Update

Lots and lots of you have been asking why I haven't updated the blog in a while. Well, I apologize for that, and so I'll be sure and fill you in. The last two weeks have been hell as I've been swollen up like a balloon. It's the main reason I haven't updated. I've been confined to my recliner almost the entire time. What is the cause? We'll between my oncologist and I, we've pretty much figured out it is the oxycodone pain medication and the type of chemotherapy I've been on. It comes as no surprise that I fell into that small minority that have this side effect to this type of chemo... lucky me :-)

The swelling went from head to toe on my body, and with this obvious handicap, I was not able to work, let alone barely walk. Breathing has even been a chore. Luckily, I've switched pain medication and taken a break from chemo -- and the swelling has been coming down. Really what it is -- is water weight, and it has been coming off slowly but surely. Tomorrow I plan to return to work, at least part time.

Wednesday will be the big day for me -- I go to OHSU in Portland to have a CT scan which will reveal if any of this chemo has helped wipe out this cancer. I am keeping my fingers crossed. If it could all be gone, I would be most grateful.

Also, on a positive note, I've had my long time friend Thane who has been living here while he goes to school. So he has definitely helped pick up the slack when I am unable.

To all of you, I thank you for your prayers and well wishes, without you, I wouldn't get through this.

-LB

Thoughts and Prayers To My Sis

I write on another sad note this evening. If the Bobbitt family has caught bad times, it seems that this year has been one of the worst. As the saying goes... "when it rains, it pours." With my recent diagnosis of cancer, medical complications that followed, and as a result, heavily strained financial times due to staggering medical bills -- the last thing my family needed was something to strike my poor sister. My family had the great fortune of hearing the news that she would be expecting a baby in May. Today (Wednesday), we learned that may not happen due to a complication in the pregnancy. It is likely that my sister will lose her baby -- as it has stopped growing. Next week she may have to make the difficult decision if it hasn't been made for her already. My thoughts and prayers are with her, and I only tear up when hearing the thought of losing my niece or nephew. If I've ever made a request in the past, this would be it, please put your thoughts and prayers with her... will you, please? Such generosity would make me appreciative to the bottom of my heart. As always, thanks for reading, and God Bless (I don't say that enough, and will start saying it more).

-LB

The Post-Chemo Lag

What am I talking about? It seems I don't feel all cruddy from chemo treatments, until the Monday after a Thursday treatment. Well not exactly, but here's how it has been going: I have chemo on Thursday, then the very next day (on Friday), I feel a bit tired, but not too cruddy. Saturday and Sunday, I (again) feel about the same, just a bit off my game, tired and just a tad cruddy... then comes Monday... I wake up feeling like I have been hit real hard in the stomach, legs swollen, and very, very tired. But don't get the wrong idea -- I feel crappy overall, all the time. I just feel the worst on the Monday following a treatment.

This past treatment went a little better than the last. The previous treatment I had two weeks ago gave me severe 'sunburn-like' burns and made life miserable! My Salem oncologist decided with my OHSU Portland oncologist to lower the dose of my chemotherapy by 20% to prevent the burns. It seems to have worked. I did get a hint of a burn this time, but NOTHING like last time. I am very grateful!

HATS OFF, to my friend Malinda Hoke for visiting me in the hospital while I was receiving treatment. She is the first and only so far to visit me while I have had treatment. I hope that's a hint to some of my other friends ;-). I told her though, "don't take any work off!" and she told me she wasn't, but still showed up -- I still have no idea if she took time off or not. She's still a very classy GAL for visiting me. THANK YOU MALINDA!

In other news... I am having a good time living with my friend Thane here in Salem. He's been a good guy to be roommates with. Especially going through what I have, it's been nice to have a familiar face around to talk to and hang out with.

Another shout-out to my fellow ODOT employees for donating their vacation time on my behalf. It is generosity such as that, which has enabled me to keep my medical insurance and keep some of a paycheck! I nearly could have lost my insurance, but thankfully did not, because I work with some very dedicated and generous folks.

-LB

What's Next?

This week was a bit of a relief when my oncologist and I decided it was better not to go forward with a chemotherapy treatment. This is because the previous two treatments caused a reaction. Apparently a reaction that only happens to about 30% of patients treated with this chemo drug. It is a burning of the skin in the legs up to the middle of the stomach. Almost like a severe sunburn, and in my opinion possibly worse. So, with that happening, along with recent severe swelling from lymphedema, and just being completely drained from all of the above -- a week off sounded pretty good to me.

Another thing I've noticed about this chemotherapy is how it is effecting me mentally. I seem to be much more forgetful and even spacey at times. Many cancer patients would refer to this as "chemo brain." I believe I am no exception, especially this being the second time in my life of having chemo treatments.

When all this negative is happening, it is so easy to get caught up in all of it and forget about the positive things. So, it is my goal to think about the positive as much as I can (and at least name one thing during each blog entry). The positive is this, I know the chemo is working because I do not feel the stabbing pain from the huge lymph nodes in my abdominal area like I did a month ago. Something must be working!

Additionally, I was able to go back to work two days this past week. It allowed me to get caught up on my email and tasks there and let everyone know that I was going to make the best effort I could to start being in the office at least 2-3 days a week (so long as the treatment doesn't get the better of me -- which it will NOT).

So there you have it. What's ahead? I will have another chemotherapy treatment this coming Thursday. The dose will be less in hopes that it will not severely burn me. Most importantly, I have a positive prognosis to look forward to.

-LB