The Good Pain

For the past weeks and months you've listened to me bicker and complain about my battle with cancer, pain, and narcotic dependency as a result. Well, no more -- a new era is beginning. For the first time in years I am taking steps in the right direction for my health. I have my friends Jonathan Stephens and Antoun Kehdi to thank.

Last week I joined a gym. If you would have asked me a year ago if I'd consider that notion, I'd probably laugh in your face. But, no, this is not a joke. I began a cardio workout for about 45 minutes a day effective last week. This week the regimen got much harder with upper and lower body weight lifting, followed by a cardio workout totalling an hour and a half per day working out. I've been following the recommendations of Jonathan, who has plenty of background with weight lifting and workouts. I'm already feeling the muscle pain, but this is a good pain -- a pain that I'm working to achieve because it means better days ahead.

It is as if the switch was flipped last week. I'm feeling more outgoing and happy since being off the medication. But more notably, I've been pain-free for a couple weeks now. With the cancer and narcotics becoming a distant memory, my life is starting to feel like it is on track.

I also want to mention some great people that I've been getting to know better at work. I met Jonathan and Antoun right off the bat when I came to work at ODOT six months ago, but more recently I've made some new friends as well. First, I'd like to mention Kelly. Oh my God... ! She is an interesting gal. She usually has something interesting, funny, and/or warped to say. Recently, she drew a bunny farting hearts on the window of my cube at work. That was a topic of discussion for several days! It is strangely weird, as she reminds me of my friend Erin Melville from Wallowa County. They could be sisters... very similar personalities! Next, I've gotten to know Malinda better lately... though she doesn't have the same personality as someone I know from back home -- even more spooky she looks IDENTICAL to my friend Alyse from Enterprise. It's totally crazy. I might be living in the bizzaro world here in Salem. More on that later...

-LB

Hope

It actually happened. I survived. I stepped out of the vicious circle. I'm not a hero. I'm not a victim. I am simply a survivor.

What I am referring to is my dependence, which admittedly, I could now describe as sometimes borderline addiction to narcotics. For over seven months I needed them to survive or at least function normally. Not anymore.

Last Saturday I woke up some 48 hours after taking my last oxycontin feeling as if I was seeing the world in high-definition. That is the only way I can describe it. I could see colors, feel things, and smell like never before... but maybe I just forgot?

For seven long months, I felt fuzzy, sweaty, constipated (yes, that is what these drugs do to you), and most odd of all, swollen. I found out as soon as I went off that they were making me retain water... how crazy is that? I immediately lost pound after pound of water, seeing my body shrink almost overnight. But, let's not get too excited -- I didn't get skinny, just less fat.

Oh, but coming off this medication didn't come without a lot of pain and discomfort. The first few days were total hell. I was hot, then cold, then depressed, then cold and depressed. Tired, but not able to sleep. Much of it felt as if I had influenza. Even a week later, I still feel anxiety and inconsistent energy. Though, what I can tell you most about the energy is that I am having trouble sleeping whereas before I couldn't stay awake.

Despite all of that, I am starting to feel good again. My mental health is improving more importantly. It as if I have finally woken up from this horrible nightmare which has easily been the worst seven months of my life.

It's nice to be back, I've missed you.

-LB

The Missed Wedding

A big congrats to my cousin JP and his new wife Amy on their marriage today, April 5, 2008.

I couldn't be there for a variety of reasons... most due to the fact I do not have any vacation time available to me yet. But the good news is in less than 30 days I will become a permanent State of Oregon employee!

In this dreaded previous seven months I have used any and all days available to me and then some. I have missed the better part of a month collectively because of my illness and my sister's wedding.

However, moving on... I think this is the last major event that I will have to miss for quite some time because I am healing, improving, and gaining ground by the day. But, boy, it would have been great to see my cousin get married in Hawaii! They did have it 'stream' over the internet, but unfortunately it was full of some technical glitches, and I only saw a small part (at least the second part of the ceremony).

Speaking of weddings... for those of you reading -- I will be working on those over the next several weeks. I have four weddings that need to be edited and burnt to DVD that I filmed last summer, and I have appreciated everyone's patience.

Vacation days are coming. Getting paid while not being at work... hmmmmm -- HOW COOL!

-LB

Top Ten For Week of April 5, 2008

1. Jonathan Stephens
2. Antoun Kehdi
3. Debbie Bobbitt
4. Carl Bobbitt
5. Michele Sawin
6. Robin Ness
7. Tim Dunn
8. Linda Barrett Courtney
9. Christian Ambroson
10. Dylan Lewis
    

Getting Back On Track

If you haven't noticed, I've been lying low lately. This, being my first blog entry in almost a month, and only the second of the year (sorry). Things haven't been good... there's no sense in making stuff up... I haven't been good. 2007 was an interesting year that brought on a lot of change, and I think 2008 is going to be a year of rebuilding and rehealing -- and a year of new experiences both unpleasant and pleasant.

First of all, to explain my last blog entry... I've had quite an ordeal with the narcotic pain medication. I want to explain that I am NOT addicted, but rather I am dependent. I actually become ill when I come off the pain meds. I get physically and mentally sick. My folks would be the first to tell you, as they are usually the first phone call I make when I'm "crashing." Teary-eyed and depressed, I tell them I feel the world is ending, or at least mine that is. The truth is, it's really not -- my parents explain this to me. The thing is, I keep telling myself it's just the medication, but no matter what my mind plays powerful tricks because of the withdrawal. So, me being the inquiring mind, asked my dad the other day "why didn't I have this feeling the first time I had cancer and pain medication?" Evidentially I didn't have much of any pain medication except before the chemotherapy, and once I was on the chemo, the pain meds were not a part of my regimen. This time, on the other hand, it was very necessary that I have pain medication to function even half way normally. You see, I was being burnt alive, which is nothing short of the truth due to the overdose of radiation I underwent last fall.

Now, I'm facing a new battle, nerve damage in my right foot. As the battle of the narcotics is winding down, I face a new fight, and that is horrific pain in my foot due to scar tissue that is apparently putting pressure on my nerve endings. I'm on a new medication now for that... more importantly -- it's non-narcotic. So, a new battle begins, but I am definitely seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I take one day at a time, remembering the people who love me, and not thinking about the people who don't.

On a lighter note, things at ODOT couldn't be better. I still very much love the job, and DO NOT miss anything about my old business. I miss my family and close friends in Joseph, but not the stress I was experiencing, especially in the latter half of last year. This was the stress that brought on my cancer, I am convinced.

I am even finding out I have some pretty good friends down here. Hanging out with my friend Michele from McMinnville has been keeping me in good spirits. My pals Jonathan and Antoun have been proving to be true assets in my 'new life' here in Salem as well. Once all of this medical stuff is behind me, I will lean on everyone a lot less and let them do some more leaning on me.

But enough of this mushy stuff. I'm taking my mom's advice, and keeping my 'chin up.' :-)

-LB

The Dependence

I write tonight in a totally different focus, one of positive thoughts and a hopeful future. This is something a week ago tonight, I could tell you was very different, in fact it was bleak.

Over the past six months I have been treated for pain as a result of my Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma which reappeared on my right foot last summer. Through radiation this past fall, a lot of healing, and a lot of rest, I can now tell you I am cancer free once again in my life. It should be normally be a time for celebration but it has actually been a time of depression. Recently, I went off the pain medication, because I no longer had pain... but what I didn't realize is... I had a dependence. It was like I had been day dreaming for the past six months and then woke up to a cold cruel reality -- or at least that is what I thought it was. However, it was not, it was a huge ugly depression which set in as my body was looking for the pain medication. I spent day after day sleeping, thinking the world was a terrible place -- in fact one thought of how life wasn't even worth living anymore. No, not taking my own life, but definitely found myself evaluating why I was even living. I knew this was because of the withdrawals, but no matter how many times I told myself it was because of that and only that, I felt like I was at rock bottom. Symptoms like sweating, trembling, and feeling cold were very common for me. After talking to my family, I knew I had to seek help, and that I did this past Tuesday where I met my new physician in Stayton, Oregon. Recommended to me by my friend Linda, this doc was incredibly thorough and caring about the situation and helped me develop a plan to rid myself of this awful dependence. It involves putting me back on a "trickle" of what I was on for the pain medication along with another prescription.

Also notably, I was kept "afloat" during my downtime by phone calls to my family and my local Salem friends.

I can tell you now here at the end of the week I am a new man, and oddly enough I am happier than I've been since before becoming ill with the cancer. I don't think I've felt this good for a couple of years. I feel renewed and very hopeful of my outlook.

One thing I've learned from all this, how powerful drugs can be, and how I don't want to be dependent on them. Here's to the happier and wonderful days ahead :-)

-LB

The Top Ten of 2007

Hello everyone,

It's that time again, or past that time (really). It's time for The Top Ten People of the Year. Just like I've told you over years past, this is unlike no regular list. This is a list of people I feel are deserving of some recognition, simply for who they are. They have impacted my life to the greatest extent during the year. I try to keep things mixed up year after year, and though possible, it is normally rare for the same exact people to be seen on the list every year.

This is the absolute latest I've ever waited to release the list. You know as the saying goes "life happens." That is exactly what has happened. After battling cancer yet again in my life this past fall, it has been a long time coming catching up on many of my day to day things, and truthfully, that is what I've been doing since the first of the year. The blog, and many of my other pastimes have had to take the backseat as I catch up on things like websites and my social life.

However, it's now time once again to honor the most important people in my life from the past year. I must say that just because a person isn't on my list, doesn't mean they aren't important to me, but chances are a person on this year's list made enough of a "splash" in my life to be worth recognizing, and shaping who I am, and who I'll becoming. So with out further, a-due, here is this year's TOP TEN PEOPLE!

#10 ~ ELIZABETH DEBOIE

Undoubtedly, a year ago I didn't even hardly know who Elizabeth DeBoie was -- except for the nice lady who more or managed our local grocery store in Joseph. Every time I went in there she was working hard.

My business, LB Productions was yet again going through growing pains, and we had recently lost an employee. This is when Elizabeth came forward and asked if I was looking for someone. I told her that I was, and ironically within a few weeks she had resigned from her post over at the store (for unrelated reasons), this is when I made the call. Shortly after coming to work for me I knew how valuable and hard working of an employee she was. She turned out to be one of the most loyal people I had ever had the pleasure of working for me.

Just months after Elizabeth came to work for my business, I was looking for a huge life change. Even as the news came down I was job hunting in the Willamette Valley, Elizabeth did not scare. She stayed working for me and told me as I recall "I'll keep working for you Levi, as long as you are here." The words were both surprising and relieving to hear.

Just a couple months later a job offer came in, and I was telling my employees the news. This is when I received another offer, an offer from Elizabeth herself, that she and her husband had a desire to purchase my business from me upon my departure. I was shocked.

Elizabeth is someone I have deep respect for. She stayed even as unsettling news came, and then decided to take the very risk on her own, to run a business that could both be profitable and a huge stress. She took on a lot, and it was something I was very up front to her about... but as she has now been at the helm for several months now, she has learned quickly, becoming a self-taught expert; like myself just over a decade ago. This made me proud of her and proud to know her.


#9 ~ KYLE HOOK

Kyle is an interesting guy, as he has a lot of "isms" that are kind of hard to figure out. This guy has been my friend for over 7 years now. Prior to that I wasn't a big fan of him, as I've told you before.

This year was a rather interesting one for Kyle and I. An underlying pressure was building on our friendship in the summer of 2007. It was not a good thing, and finally came to blows one summer evening after we got off from wakeboarding on the lake. It broke out into a huge argument and turned completely ugly. Without sharing any further personal details, it was involving a mutual friend and I didn't feel he treated this friend respectfully. But to this day, I realize that it wasn't necessarily my business.

Though I defend all of my friends, I realize that I can overstep my bounds sometimes. Kyle and I have since mended over this. This huge bump in our friendship has only strengthened it. Now we are as close as ever, even with me living across the state.

Kyle is a fun guy to be around. He says the funniest things. He's a major goofball. This is why I like him. Next time you see Kyle, ask him about the Sirius Satellite Radio telephone operator we had fun with :-)




#8 ~ MICHELE SAWIN

Michele has been my friend for nearly ten years now, but this is her first appearance on The Top Ten People list. I've been doing this list for ten years now, so it was about time.

Michele is a very sweet person. She will go out of her way to help out a fellow human being. I am eternally grateful for what she did for me this past fall. I recently had moved to Salem, and with the discovery of my cancer, I had to start radiation treatments. With the medication and treatments, I was in a deteriorating condition to be driving from Salem to Portland everyday for treatment. This is when Michele stepped in... and in a big way she did.

Michele was there for me when I needed someone the most. Her sister Virginia proved to be a big help as well along the way.

Even when days seemed grim, Michele was there to pick me up and take me to Portland. She kept me laughing when I needed a good laugh. She kept me smiling when I needed to be happy. She made a lot of my dark days much, much brighter. Thank you, Michele.


#7 ~ AMY KYLE-PERCY

My fellow cancer survivor, Amy Kyle-Percy has been an inspiration to me this past year. She was always a person I could call up to and complain about life. She always had a smiling face when I'd go see her on one of my many trips to the valley during my job hunt. In a way, I am thankful I did so much traveling this year, because I got to see people like her, more.

Amy has been an instrumental person in my life to lean on during my recent (and hopefully the last) battle with the big 'C.; She understands what the dark days are. In fact, she's had some dark days herself, and with encouragement, she has been able to pull ahead too.

Amy is total proof that this horrible disease can be beaten, and that life can go on. I am very happy to know her, she is a great lift to my attitude when I'm down.

I suggest we all look in our own lives to our "Amys" when things have us down. You don't have to look any further than this human being to have your spirit lifted.


#6 ~ THANE SHETLER

The middle child syndrome. Thane is a classic example of this. Looking for acceptance, looking for someone to pay attention to the things he does. Thane has made some mistakes in his life.

But guess what? He's proven everyone wrong and completely rebounded from being in a horrible situation. Yeah, the kid made mistakes, but he shouldn't have to pay the rest of his life, nor should he be labeled a "troubled kid." Truthfully, Thane is now one of the most grounded human beings that I know. He and I have bonded in the past year more deeper than ever. As Thane was telling me about being on drugs, he broke down. The guy felt terrible for the mistakes he had made. Then I broke down. I'll never forget that conversation. He and I knew we had each other as friends to get through no matter what.

He's come a long way... and now it looks like he's going an even longer way... physically that is. He's thinking of moving from Portland to New York. Such a notion is terrorizing to me as he is one of the few people I have around that is familiar to me since I've moved from Joseph to the Willamette Valley. But I will support him no matter what. I just want him to be happy and I know he'd want the same for me.

When I know the odds aren't good, all I have to do is look at my friend Thane to know that I can turn things around no matter how horrible of a hand life has dealt.

Additionally, if his inspiration isn't enough, Thane is incredibly hilarious and ALWAYS fun to be around. Even when he's in a bad mood, he's entertaining. Thane, thank you for letting me share your downfalls and your triumphant rebound. We all can learn from you.




#5 ~ ALYSE FISCHER

She actually gives a damn. She's as sweet as sugar too. In fact, she's too sweet sometimes. She's almost cares too much for fellow human beings. There aren't many people like Alyse around anymore. I personally learned of her undying passion to care about her family and friends when she started dating my best friend Sterling.

Since being a HUGE part of Sterling's life, she's become a very important part of my life. She's all about details. She will remember the things you care about -- even the small things. I recall the summer that she defended me, when someone was treating me terribly. She's also good at pointing out a person's flaws and positive aspects. When you're in her corner, you can expect to be showered with compliments and kindness.

One classic example is her making me a birthday cake every year, or giving me an easter basket. I mean who would care enough to do that? Alyse would.

Her dedication to those she loves is unsurpassed. Alyse, thank you for going the extra effort and lifting me up; and for goodness sakes, take some time for yourself!















#4 ~ CHRISTIAN AMBROSON

Christian has been my friend for over 7 years now, and my best friend for the last 3 years. He's been on my Top Ten People of the Year for the past three years. I can't say enough about this guy. He's the man!

Christian Ambroson is one of the most caring people I know. It is those types of qualities that I look for in a friend, and since almost day one, I knew we shared a lot in common. One thing in particular, he and I shared a lot of the same hobbies from early on as I didn't do a lot of the "small town things," and he was from Lake Oswego. Just as an example, it seemed all of my Joseph friends would go hunting, and I swear Christian and I were the only people in town who didn't hunt. It was things like that, a lot of little things like that.

In 2005, Christian and I lost a close mutual friend. In such a dark time, Christian and I grieved together, ironically further bonding us as friends. At the time Christian was in an exchange program in Austria during his second year of college. As you can imagine being thousands of miles away while losing such a close friend was not an easy thing to go through. But we got through it, together.

This year, we took a cross country road trip together. It was both exciting and completely boring at times. But you ever wonder what makes a good friendship? The fact that you can sit in a car with someone when you are completely bored off your ass! You start talking to yourself and saying weird things -- you instantly become more comfortable with the other person. And that I did with Mr. Ambroson.

Christian is truly one of a kind, and it is my absolute privilege to call him my best friend. He's one of few people on this earth I have no problem telling them that I love, as he says the same to me. We share a bond like brothers, we care about each other like family. Christian, I love you man; take care and see you on our next adventure!










#3 ~ JONATHAN STEPHENS

It seems a very fitting time to talk about this next person. Not since I met my best friend Christian Ambroson have a met someone so similar. He too, also from the Portland area. Jonathan Stephens has quickly become one of my best friends. I'd even venture to go out on a limb and say within the top five.

Frankly, I don't even know where to start. It's hard to wrap my mind around this guy. But what I can tell you is that I do really like this kid. He's got the best friend qualities written all over him. He's funny, caring, smart, honest, and just plain cool.

The 'J Dawg' and I met shortly after I started my new career at ODOT. It's quite funny, but the first day at work I saw him and had a feeling that I'd soon get to know him. My inkling was right on, Jonathan introduced himself to me a couple days later. Things quickly got stranger as we virtually started finishing each other sentences or thinking almost the same thoughts quite frequently. He's a GIS Technician for ODOT, and works just a couple cubicles away. Now entering my fourth month of working for ODOT, it seems like I've know Jonathan for almost two years -- simply because we see each other everyday almost all day. Then, if that isn't enough we often hang out in the evenings together.

Another great thing is that Jonathan introduced me to another really cool guy named Antoun Kehdi. He too is originally from Portland. We all can be found daily hanging out both by day and evening. We probably see each other more often than anything else.

Jonathan is perfect representation of my new life. I anticipated that it could take six months to a year before I made some good friends to even come close to the caliber of my Joseph friends. Jonathan and later Antoun proved that wrong.

Whether it be our geeky nerdy conversation about upcoming technology or one of our many observations about people who work in section of ODOT (which shall go nameless), the J Dawg and I are strikingly a lot a like... though I am a much fatter version. Haaah! Thanks buddy for being who you are and someone I can look forward to hanging out with each day. And who knew by pure fluke we'd have so much in common, but there are reasons for everything I suppose.

#2 ~ STERLING SHETLER

My best friend. No wait, Christian is my best friend. Uhh... wait a second, so is Sterling. Okay, I come clean -- I have two best friends. They are TIED as my BFF's.

Again, I've known Sterling as long as I've known Christian. For at least two years, Sterling has been my best friend. It's funny, because I call Jonathan "Sterling 2." The reason why, Jonathan is the Sterling equivalent to my original friend from Joseph.

Sterling is probably one of the most loyal, funny, cruel, and honest people I know. He's a real hard ass, but actually has a heart of gold, truthfully. He's Thane's brother (earlier on the list). They are nothing a like, not for a second. But they are both true individuals, and you like them the same for their unique personalities.

So you see, Sterling and I became close during the massive exodus of friends that left Joseph for college and other places. We both didn't really care for the Joseph bar scene, and were perfectly content just hanging out. That we share in common -- we both share the quality of being reclusive.

And by far, the largest admirable quality of Sterling is the fact that he doesn't care what others think. He conducts life the way he wants and doesn't let anyone influence him but himself. Though many times he's influenced my life -- that doesn't bother him. He can influence you, but don't even try to get him to be a certain way. It just isn't going to happen. That's why I love this guy.

Beyond my family, he's the person I miss the most from Joseph. I even tear up at this moment recalling our good times. But I know I won't be a stranger and neither will he just because we are in two different places.

Sterling isn't an overly emotional guy either, at least he's not going to let you know about it. But I found out that the guy truthfully does have feelings. I know he was pretty upset when he learned I was moving. He'd never come out and tell me, but his girlfriend did -- and it's moments like that which make me realize that even though he doesn't show it, the kid really considers me his best friend too. No matter where we're at Sterling, I hope we remain BFF.

AND NOW THE MOMENT YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR....










THIS YEAR'S NUMBER ONE










THE MOST INFLUENTIAL, MOST IMPACTING PERSON









THE #1 PERSON OF 2007.......

#1 ~ MELISSA NEWHOUSE

Two years ago I didn't even know who Melissa Newhouse was. But then, my life changed forever. I met her as she was dating one of my friends. Then, last summer she moved in for the summer and our bond was unbreakable ever since.

I can tell you right now, without a doubt, I wouldn't be living in Salem, Oregon if it wasn't for Melissa. She was absolutely instrumental in pushing me (literally) to make this move. It all started one warm July evening when I told her of my aspirations to move west. Her first reaction was "why do you want to do that?" When I told her I felt that I had been living in a rut for years, she could immediately relate it to her own life, and within days and weeks she was sending me the strongest encouragement I had ever seen. You see, I had been contemplating on moving for nearly 5 years, but for some reason as things got closer to an actual move, I always had an excuse to back out. Not this time, she was the one who finally pushed me over that edge.

She helped me realize that I was young, and this was the time to do something like this. We had many, many deep conversations and finally she came to almost threatening me if I didn't do what my heart was telling me. So it was set, I was to move to the Willamette Valley, and the job search became full blown over the period of several weeks in July and August, when one August afternoon I received a call from the woman who is now my supervisor that I had gotten a job, one of my top picks in fact, with the Oregon Department of Transportation.

Most of my job hunt was centered in the Portland area, and very few were south in Salem, but for some reason life brought me to Salem. As a result I wouldn't be here talking to you about people like Jonathan or Antoun. They wouldn't exist in my life. If it wasn't for Melissa I would still be living in Joseph, in my rut, probably forever. But this girl had enough pep and vinager (I think that's how the saying goes), to push me to the point to make a huge life change. One that was both scary and absolutely exciting.

But you know what else? Melissa was a great friend, an absolute gem to have around. Her and I hung out like old friends all summer long and I won't ever forget our good times. I recall our midnight trips to Wal Mart in La Grande. We would drive all night and have the best time talking and hitting that discount store at all hours. No it wasn't about the prices or shopping... it was about the experience! The bonding as friends. A bond that grew into a true friendship. Melissa, people even ask me to this day if I have regrets over making this desicion, and my response is "yeah, that I didn't do it sooner." I thank you for enriching my life and allowing me to get out of a completely toxic situation. You're the reason I now enjoy life... THANK YOU! I hope you now why you've been chosen as my TOP PERSON FOR 2007!

2007: A Year of Change

2007 was not just any year. For me, it represented more change than I have ever faced in my life. Change for the good I hope. This is both a new and exciting time for me in my life, the things that use to be "normal" to me in my life are now history. I am living an entirely new life in a new place, new people, and a new adventure.

The year started like any other. LB Productions was thriving and I had a fairly basic social life in Joseph, Oregon. Little did I know, by year's end my life was going to have changed forever. So what prompted all this you ask? Where did it all come from?

People who know me well aren't surprised at the big changes that 2007 brought. For the past two years I had considered these changes. But when did I finally "break?"

In March I went on a long, long road trip across the country with my best friend Christian Ambroson. It was that trip that spawned a great debate in my mind... "what was I doing with my life?" My buddy and I had a great time, though the trip was long and boring in some spots, it gave us both time to think about life. For me, it was almost a soul searching mission.

The trip essentially started in Portland, where I left my car for when I flew back. Christian and I rode home to Joseph with his parents and left the next morning. We traveled across the midwest, eventually making it to Steubenville, Ohio where he goes to school. Days later I got on a Southwest Airlines flight and flew from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania back to Portland. It was the most miserable flight of my life. The flight was hot (due to an air circulation problem). The seats were uncomfortable, and I sat next to the most annoying person. By the time I reached Portland I wanted to kiss the ground. Most of the trip across the country was brown and dead or snow covered, simply because of the time of year. Oddly enough, though, when I returned to Portland everything was green and blossoming. It felt like a great place to be. The feeling was right, and after spending a few days with my friends Dylan and Thane (even making a side trip to the coast), I snapped! It hit me: I couldn't waste anymore of my life doing what I was doing. I wanted to move to the Willamette Valley, and move I did.

My reasoning was quite simple... I was burnt out. The business had eaten me alive. In the ten years I actively ran the business my stress had risen to an uncomfortable level. By 2005, my weight and blood pressure were at a very unhealthy level. In 2007 cancer returned. I was spiraling out of control, all on the account of working too hard, changes had to be made or I was looking at an early death. I recall one of my doctors asking me "Levi, what do you expect to happen if things continue in the same direction?" It was then I realized I was in serious trouble.

With that being said, the spring of 2007 went like any other, I had record computer sales in my business... things for the most part went smoothly. I had one of the greatest summers ever, but the number of Joseph friends was dwindling. Our close group was shrinking, people were moving on with their lives. I felt as if I was in a rut. The pressure was building. I had to get out.

I was part of Relay for Life for the first part of the year. It was very meaningful for me, being a cancer survivor. I helped organize the largest and most successful relay team in Wallowa County history.

The summer kicked off with lots of fun on the lake in my Mastercraft Ski Boat... my only reprieve from the daily grind of my life. As you can imagine it was no challege finding friends to come join me out on the water. I will say though, it was harder than in previous years because so many of my local friends were disappearing for the big city. This included my friend Jay Watts (pictured below) who became a full time Portland resident. Previously, he came home for the summer. This was just another factor in my decision.

In June I started applying for jobs over the internet, by late June I had interviews scheduled in the Portland and Salem areas. The first job that came to the surface was a position at the Forest Grove School District as the lead technology coordinator at the help desk. This position looked promising... however, I was not hired. This ended up being a good thing as I really didn't feel a good fit in that area. A few weeks later I was actually hired at a call center called Stream in Beaverton. I did not take the job as it wasn't paying nearly what I made at my own business. Then, I received a call in mid July from the Oregon Department of Transportation to schedule an interview. Oddly enough, this was one of my top picks for a job. I was not surprised about the interview, but the fact it had been narrowed down to four people. I had a great interview, and a couple months later my references told me they had been called. This is how I knew it was serious... and just a day later the woman who is now my supervisor called me up and told me the great news. Not terribly thrilled about moving to Salem (my priority was in Portland), I still took the job. It was almost late September at this point, and I never expected to be hired as it had been over two months since the interview.

Back track to late August -- things had progressed so much in my job search, I made a decision to downsize my business; to move it out of the nearly 1000 square foot office space (pictured), to the back two bedrooms of my house. Without any word of a new job, the plan was to just keep running it 'business as usual.' That's when ODOT called, and it was all over.

I informed my employees of the good news (for me, but not for them). To my absolute surprise, one of them offered to buy the business prior to my departure. It was all set, and I started my new life on October 29th, working for the Oregon Department of Transportation. LB Productions became Simply Digital October 1st, and the web development portion was split off, and renamed "LBSITES."

In the midst of this all, I discovered a exterior bump on my right foot. Being a long time sufferer of a very rare condition called Lymphomatoid Papulosis, I assumed it was just another outbreak. After a trip to OHSU's emergency room, and a biopsy, I found out for the second time in my life I had cancer. For the first three weeks of my new job, I drove or was driven by friends to radiation treatments. This added an extra challenge to my already changing life.

By the end of November, the cancer was history -- the effects of the radiation were not. I spent ten days off from work recuperating from "collateral damage" caused by the radiation. My entire body swelled up and my foot was still a mess. It is still unknown at this time if I received too much radiation.

At the beginning of December things began to bounce back, my body was healing. By the second week my spirits were lifting. The third week my sister married her sweetheart in a small ceremony in Las Vegas. The final week of the month, I made a quick trip back to Joseph for Christmas. I received numerous comments on my weight loss and how good I was looking. For the first time in my life, I have become virtually stress-free. Who knew in one year I could reach my goal? Who knew I could recover from the worst so quickly? Though I miss my family and friends in Joseph... I have goosebumps thinking about my new life here in the valley. My new friends and my former skinny self returning are enough to make 2007 'my year.'

-LB

Back in Salem

No post holiday blues here, in fact quite the contrary. Usually I get the blues during the holidays. This year was no exception. I really can't explain it, but I just do. The drive home to Joseph wasn't all that bad until I hit Meacham on Saturday night, that is when the I-84 turned into a parking lot. It's like people forgot how to drive or something. So after spending an extra hour of my trip in the snow, I landed in La Grande where I took a breather at the Taco Bell and proceeded into the county. I had a good holiday with my family and did something quite unusual... stayed at my parents -- which isn't something I've done since well... last month during Thanksgiving. The great news is that I rented out my house in Joseph, so that left me with no place to stay but at my folks. It wasn't bad at all, and it was nice having my mom cook all the meals and to not have to worry about much of anything. I spent the majority of my time with my best friend Sterling Sunday (hoping to see my other best friend Christian later this week). We had a ceremonial "burning" of my Joseph stuff. It was kind of sad... but really more fun than anything. Later that night, he, Alyse, and I got together and had a mini Christmas after eating at El Bajio -- which I have missed immensely by the way! Seems as if no place down here in Salem can 'get it right.' So Sterling and Alyse got me the coolest present ever - a digital photo frame... which turned out to be one of the hottest gifts of this holiday season.

Went home and had a pretty mellow Christmas Eve. My sister and her new husband Colby came back for the holiday. Christmas day arrived and it was all but time for me to leave. I did pretty well, got some clothes and most notably an Outback gift card which I can use for one of my many dinners I have at my next-door neighbor here in Salem. Then, yes of course, I had to leave...

The trip home wasn't bad, until I hit the Gorge. Then it got quite bad, and several times I thought I was going to can it up with all the stupid drivers around me. It was snowing hard and continuously and just wouldn't stop. It was piling up on the sides of the road and blowing hard. It got to the point where it was slushing up on the road surface and people started sliding around. Finally I arrived in Troutdale and life was once again good with just plain rain (hey, that rhymes). This morning I woke up bright-eyed and bushy tailed and went back to work. Thankfully my good pal Jonathan was there too so it wasn't all bad. It was just kind of crummy having to go back to work right after Christmas. Nonetheless, it's life, right?

-LB

P.S. TOP TEN PEOPLE OF 2007 COMING SOON!

Top Ten for Week of December 15, 2007

1. Thane Shetler & Dylan Lewis
2. Debbie Bobbitt
3. Carl Bobbitt
4. Jonathan Stephens
5. Antoun Kehdi
6. Robin Ness
7. Alyse Fischer
8. Amy Kyle-Percy
9. Sterling Shetler
10. Michele Sawin